Thursday, August 5, 2010

Parents can be a little stuffy sometimes

Check out my contest entry for Parenting.com - the official request was to leave a brilliant/funny/moving/off-the-wall comment in response to: "What’s your best tip for saving money on back-to-school supplies?"  For context, the preceding comment was:

Don't wait until back to school time.  If you see something on sale/clearance, buy it then.  That way you can spread out the expense over the year.  And pay attention to sales fliers.

and the subsequent one read:

First is to cut any and all coupons i can get my hands on.  If you are willing to drive to a few different stores then i make a list depending on what deals any of the stores are offering.  To save even more if you can stock up when stores start to clearance out the school supplies and have most of your list for next year already done!



A tad trite, no?  In fact, 119 out of 120 comments were all essentially the same.  For the 120th, I thought I'd latch onto the "off-the-wall" criteria in the contest description and apply my marketing knowledge in creating a point of differentiation with my comment.  Take a gander, won't you?

The best way to save on school supplies is like with most other things.  Make them yourself.  It's really quite simple, you just need some creativity, discipline, and a little MacGyver-brand elbow grease.

For example, in order to make a pencil, all you need is a twig from a spruce tree, and access to a graphite-clay composites.  Just bore a hole longitudinally through the center of the twig (be careful not to break it!) and fill with the composite.  Depending on if you prefer a standard #2 pencil versus a 2.5 or a 3, be sure to vary the composite ratio accordingly and voila! homemade pencils for everyone!

You would probably think that making a pen would be far more challenging since it's made out of synthetic materials... or is it?  At its most basic form, a pen is simply an ink delivery vehicle.  And what's the most efficient at deliverying ink in nature?  That's right!  The Octopus.  Just go grab an octopus from the ocean (don't try to capture the one from the local aquarium, it turns out that is frowned upon).  I prefer species octopus vulgaris for its beautiful, rich purple/black ink.  Then "milk" the octopus with a standard rattlesnake milking apparatus and reserve the ink.  Afterwards, trap a primary flight bird and pluck a dozen or so quills.  Lastly, use capillary action to get the ink into the individual quills.  You're done, and this turns out to be a seamless segue to discussing the technology during the era of our founding fathers with your child as well.  It's the gift that keeps on giving!
Enjoy!

I'm hoping I win the grand prize of $100 worth of Bic Pens.  That'd be some good affirmation for further commentbombs.

FOTY

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